Tuesday, January 31, 2006

I just got a phone call

from my mother. My grandfather has died. I never met him, but he was somehow always a presence in our life. I remember being very small and watching my father's slide-shows of his visit to Argentina, and how fascinated I was by and how loving I felt towards the stern, noble face of my Abuelo in the pictures, and how much I have always wanted to meet him. I am grieving for my father, who can't go home to Argentina for the funeral. I am grieving for the long separation he has endured from his family, and I am grieving for all of us who did not have the chance to know this grandfather. I beg Friends to please hold my whole family in the light. This is really really hard for the family in North Carolina, and for the family in Argentina, and for me out here in MA, all of us unable to comfort each other except by long distance.

My mother wrote more about it here:
Mum2Twelve

I was lead today to this beautiful prayer from The Authorized Daily Prayer Book, a book of Jewish prayer. I don't care how much my particular theology meshes with it, it is a prayer of great majesty and comfort. And before I give you the prayer, I will give you a tiny snippet from The Candle, The Lantern, The Daylight by Mildred Binns Young (which I have a lot to blog about, later.)

"And I am no longer reluctant to use prayers written or spoken by others and learned by heart. They begin in others, but by using them we root them in ourselves. We make them our own and when the heart is unable to open towards God, these prayers can act as keys. Once the heart is open, it finds its own words until that moment comes when it needs none."


’O Lord and King, who art full of compassion, in whose hand is the soul of every living thing and the breath of all flesh, who killest and makest alive, who bringest down to the grave and bringest up again, receive, we beseech Thee, in Thy great loving-kindness, the soul of our brother who hath been gathered unto his people. Have mercy upon him, pardon all his transgressions, for there is not a righteous man upon earth, who doeth good and sinneth not. Remember unto him the righteousness which he wrought, and let his reward be with him and his recompense before him. O shelter his soul in the shadow of Thy wings. Make known to Him the path of life: in Thy presence is fulness of joy; at Thy right hand are pleasures for evermore. Vouchsafe unto him of the abounding happiness that is treasured up for the righteous, as it is written, Oh how great is Thy goodness, which Thou hast laid up for them that fear Thee, which Thou hast wrought for them that trust in Thee before the children of men!

’O Lord, who healest the broken-hearted and bindest up their wounds, grant Thy consolation unto the mourners: put into their hearts the fear and love of Thee, that they may serve Thee with a perfect heart, and let their latter end be peace.

’Like one whom his mother comforteth, so will I comfort you, and in Jerusalem shall ye be comforted. Thy sun shall no more go down, neither shall thy moon withdraw itself; for the Lord shall be thine everlasting light, and the days of thy mourning shall be ended.

’He will destroy death for ever; and the Lord will wipe away tears from off all faces; and the rebuke of his people shall he take away from off all the earth: for the Lord hath spoken it.’

12 comments:

KatieButler said...

I'm sorry for your family's loss. My his soul rest in peace.

Liz Opp said...

I sense the longing and the grief threaded among these words, Amanda. You are in my thoughts.

Blessings,
Liz, The Good Raised Up

Kate said...

My prayers are with you, your family, and (of course) your grandfather's soul.

Anonymous said...

My prayers and thoughts are with you and your family. Take comfort in the thought that life is just changed, not taken away.

Anonymous said...

My sympathies for your family's loss, Amanda. Peace to your abuelito.

Rosemary said...

You're in my thoughts and prayers as well . . .

David said...

Peace

Anonymous said...

Strength and peace to you and to your family.

ef said...

Oh Amanda!

You and your family are in my heart.

Pam

QuakerDave said...

Amanda, you are in our thoughts and prayers.

Nancy A said...

Grief about distances and arms that can only stretch so far.

Peace.

Rich in Brooklyn said...

Amanda,

I wonder how you're doing now that a couple of weeks have passed. I'm sure that the grief of many in your family will be with them for much longer than that, and the same may be true for you even though (or especially because?) you hadn't met your grandfather in the flesh.

I miss your blog postings. Hope to see some more soon. Hope you are also healing and helping your family to heal.

- - Richard
Brooklyn Quaker